Miss Piggy had been almost invisible for five years, but suddenly her flesh looked peachy.
I looked into the handheld woe-is-me mirror I kept on my nightstand.
We produce events because we want to help you make an impact. Come to think of it, in life – the best things usually are that clear and simple.
Of course, that's when I used to care about how I looked.
I was not religious either, but I didn't think she'd figured that out yet.
Her strongest beliefs were in cable television, drive-through windows, and airbrushed fingernails.
As I cried, the Muppet Babies on my thin pillowcase turned brighter than I'd ever seen them.
Dancing Kermit went from faded green to the shade of a ripe avocado.