Funny dating puns

Karaoke Bank is up for sale and is (you guessed it! A piece of string walked into a bar and said "Gimme a beer! When the string went back into the bar, the bartender looked at him suspiciously and said "Aren't you that worthless piece of string I just threw outta here? Intrigued, the young man asked if he could be allowed to work the machine, but his request was denied.Said the store manager, "Sorry, kid, but baggers can't be juicers." Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet.We need to go."10) Walk up to a random person and say, "Wow!You've changed, I still have your picture from five years ago." And hold up a picture of potato.11) Call Mc Donalds asking for directions to Burger King.12) Order a pizza 5 minutes before New Years, and when it comes, yell, "I ORDERED THIS THING A YEAR AGO! When people try to get on ask if they have an appointment.14) Go to an electronic store with a banana and say that you want to upgrade to an apple.15) Call Pizza Hut and ask for the phone number to Domino's.16) Hide a walk talkie in a bush and scare people that walk by.17) Get on a crowded elevator with a bag in your hands, sigh and say "darn my snake got loose again".18) When someone asks you if you know what time it is, say yes and walk away.19) Dress up as a duck and throw bread at people and say,"HOW DO YOU LIKE IT?!! 20) Go to a pet shop, point at an employee, and shout "I WANT THAT ONE MOMMY!!!Most people take one of two wrong tacks when coming up with an online dating username: 1) Putting ZERO thought into it: Bill10247, Claire T, Ally Cat 2) Putting minimal thought into it, using a literal description: Tall Doctor, Gorgeous Goddess, Fun2Be Around The problem with these efforts, of course, is not that they’re “bad”, but rather that they’re BORING. All of them are plays off of real names, idioms or catchphrases, which is why they evoke smiles from readers.There’s nothing unique, memorable or distinguishing. One of my favorite usernames was The Goose Whisperer, written for a client named Bobbi in 2005. So if you’re wondering how to come up with a clever name that gets attention, and attracts a like-minded person with a great sense of humor, I have an exercise that can help you come up with usernames just like the ones I mention above.Usually I’ll steer clear of someone’s name for the same reason I’ll steer clear of their profile …it reflects that we have wildly different interests.

Some of them are groaners, but some are quite funny.I believe we should all pay our tax bill with a smile. As someone who has been an online dating coach since 2003, I’d venture to guess that I’ve not only seen more usernames than just about anyone on the planet, but I’ve written more of them as well.After the cigarette, the boy just sat in the driver's seat looking out the window. Following last week's news that Origami Bank had folded, we are hearing that Sumo Bank has gone belly up and Bonsai Bank plans to cut back some of its branches. " So the string left, but he was thirsty, and he really wanted a beer, so he messed up his hair real badly and looped himself around until he had tied himself into a knot. One day the store installed a machine for squeezing fresh orange juice.

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