These are the types of guys I feel we foreign girls encounter most. ” I think that’s generally a big problem – not only when trying to find an “honest” relationship, but also true friends.
I’ve heard from many people that they were just “used” as an opportunity to get free English lessons (or whatever their native language was).
Obviously we change it according to the circumstances (we are not going to speak in English to each other when out with a lot of Japanese friends! If you need a lot of hugs and affection, make sure that he knows and don’t just get annoyed that he’s not automatically doing it.My first Japanese boyfriend would go for weeks without contacting me because he was working late every day.Also, a general lack of e-mailing, phone calls etc. Although I don’t think that this just applies to Japanese men!We only spoke in Japanese with each other for a short time before he started to learn English, so he could communicate with me better.We eventually stopped speaking Japanese and now I’m actually unable to speak Japanese in front of him (shy, embarrassed … I actually forget that he’s Japanese and that he can speak Japanese.” After we got married we had some trouble with things like housework and money, but I’m not sure if that’s just him, a Japanese trait, or normal married life.